A new earth
Vibrating a truly positive energy can seem almost impossible when you are tuned into societies voice on this planet. I know I can flounce around in pessimism and to numb the pain I seek personal pleasures which take the edge off. Whether its trawling on Instagram or reading BBC news statistics on how many people have perished in a natural disaster, it's all there for the taking. It feeds this 'pain body' that Eckhart Tolle speaks about and mine has an alarmingly large appetite. Its thirst isn't quenched even when I spend time with people whose world view is so negative and grey, that I leave reminded of the worlds imminent end. This reminder comes with a dollop of self-loathing and a side order of overwhelm.
Each time this happens to me, I feel my energy shrink and the truth of what I know creep back behind my curly mane. My ego is cleverly coming up with images in my head of people who will read this blog and scoff at my words. 'You don't know what the world is really like Jen. You're a white middle class woman who has financial stability. You don't know about reality'. Whilst all of those identity points are fact, I do know my truth has importance in this space.
To me deep down, the world is a remarkably beautiful place.
I do not deny that there is suffering and violence in the world. I do not close my eyes and pretend not to see it. There is oppressive racism, homophobia and transphobia on all corners of the earth. And all of these could be categorised under War; raging battles against white supremacist patriarchy with many lives lost on the front lines. Whilst there is the constant uphill battle of negativity that our society tells us we must participate in every day, there is another approach that brings great enlightenment and inner peace to our world. And that is presence.
Oprah and Eckhart Tolle's podcast 'A New Earth' is to me, the most powerful podcast on the planet. It is so profound that when I first listened, my jaw dropped to the floor like a cartoon character. They explore the new level consciousness that we as humans need to tap into, in order to shift our planet to a better place. One notion is, if we all took the time to make peace with ourselves would there be war in our external world? The fundamental answer is no. Everyday violence is uprooted in a lack of connection to ones self. If a violent situation occurs and you are an observer, responding in a conscious and present way will be much more fruitful than reacting from ego. It's bloody hard to do, but Oprah suggests that by responding with presence, we will work to improving connections to ourselves, our communities and our planet. I know if I am raging inside at a situation, I bring about no change to improve it. I can scream all I want, the only thing that changes is the heightened pain level in my chest. I proceed to carry it around with me all day, whilst my ego gently whispers in my ear 'you are a moron, life is pointless'.
The fucking ego mann, what a funny trickster it is. It hides itself as identity and in a very insular society that looks upon individualism as its salvation, I feel the Jen Carss ego is taking me for a wild ride. The stories it repeats to me are completely manufactured. The more time I spend sitting in silence and listening, the more the ideas of who I thought I was are slipping away.
It can feel terrifying to take another route. Being present on the outside looks like a waste of time. A mate told me she was scared to lose an hour in her day sitting doing nothing. We don't have time to be present, but we do have time to mindlessly consume reels of negativity from the moment we wake until the moment we put our phone down for bed. Our western civilisation is more financially abundant than ever yet our mental health is deteriorating quicker than ever. We can buy all the crap we want and have it delivered the next day, but we are empty of peace.
Inside of my head is one twisted slapstick comedy and I am tired of pretending I am happy living this way. It nearly killed me and I had to hit absolute rock bottom before I looked for support. Connection to presence is alleviating pain I have felt for so long and I wonder if it could help you too.
The space within you holds infinite power. It can bring about creativity beyond comprehension, compassion for those who need it most AND form ideas to bring about change for the world in a conscious manner. We don't need to go live in the woods and play the panflute. We don't need to step out of society and engage with squirrels. We just need to start being more present.
We can't keep fighting with each other like this. Our spiritual gifts and passions are waiting within us, to ripple through to those who need it. The world around us is abundant. The more we take time to watch pigeons in town, taste delicious food we are eating and take in the people we are meeting, the more this world will evolve. I am testament that it can change your world and so are millions of people across the planet. Be brave and take a moment to be with you. You are important. You a brilliant and we need you to be you. Not the egos version of you, but the energy and space you truly are.